Scholars Sanctuary

 Samantha Jones (Sex & the city), Regine Hunter (Living Single), (Toni Childs (Girlfriends), and Blanche Devereaux ( The Golden Girls) are all the same character, and NONE of them are a girl’s girl! Samantha Jones is lauded as one-from the episode where she doesn’t judge Carrie for engaging in an affair with married “Big”. That’s not something to be applauded. Carrie, Sam’s friend, was sleeping with her ex-who was married to another woman. But how could Sam judge Carrie when Sam, herself, engaged in sex with married men? Hell, Sam lacked sexual discipline and slept with pretty much anyone. She lacked boundaries and somehow, the early 2000’s saw her as a pioneer or goddess. I was there, I remember!  I’ve stated this before, but the older I get, the more reserved I become. I can look back on past actions/behaviors and analyze WHY I engaged in them. From there, I try to steer others in a different direction. I’d rather help you figure out your WHY before you spend months or y...

Is it a deal breaker to date someone who doesn’t share the same religious/spiritual beliefs as you? It might not be, but it SHOULD be. Not just spiritually, but we-as beings-have to stop compromising our values just to be with others. My father died in February. I blogged about it (Death…the ugly side). He was a good father, a church deacon Sunday school teacher, former member of the male chorus etc. He was involved with his church, the congregation. But what stood out the most for me is how he prayed over his family. We would have family prayers where we would all gather together and he would pray with, for, and over us, and we would be able to add/share our thoughts or prayers, too. Our last family prayer was here, at my home, New Year’s Day. That’s something he did for our family-as far as I can remember-over 35 years.  My relationship with God is important. It matters to me. Even when I stray, I find my way back. I’m getting better at doing better. I pray, daily. God and I, we ...

Marriage is a piece of paper. Marriage is a contract-like a business arrangement. Marriage is a commitment between two people. Marriage is becoming one with another person. Yep, it’s all of that stuff. It shouldn’t be entered into lightly.  I teach criminology. Sometimes, our discussions contain issues that relate to modern society. For example: We discussed “body count”/promiscuity and how it correlates to criminal behavior. If one lacks discipline and self control, they are more likely to engage in risky and/or violent behavior. I remember telling my students to marry someone who shares the same or similar goals. Marry someone who will complement you. Someone who pushes you to grow, to better yourself. Love is fine, but there has to be more to sustain a marriage than “we love each other”. How many couples are stagnant-how many individuals in marriages are stagnant because they aren’t allowing themselves to grow-because they don’t want to outgrow their partner? Love is fine, but d...

Sex is such a beautiful act. It’s being naked-physically and emotionally. It is the closest two people can get. The anticipation of being with someone in that way can conjure up greater excitement than the actual experience. To be intimate with another…..to share yourself….it should be treated as something very special.  My love languages are “acts of service” and “physical touch”. I enjoy doing kind things for those I love. I also enjoy physically being in the presence of the one I love. Kissing. Touching. Being held. Cuddling. All those fall under the umbrella of intimacy. There’s an awareness of vulnerability that resides in being intimate. Essentially, you are allowing another into your safe space. Being open to love also means being open to hurt. Joy and pain. The risk is worth it. All or nothing.  As I write this, I find myself holding back what I really want to say. I guess I’m not as naked as I thought I was. 😉 The idea of being that way with another….again… is exciti...

Teaching is my passion. It’s what I will do until I retire. Currently, I teach college students. Most recently, I’ve taught elementary students. I taught at a Catholic school (I grew up Catholic). Religion is a subject I enjoy studying. World religions intrigue me. With that being said, I’ve spent many years trying to get closer to God. That, in itself, is wonderful.  My issue is reconciling the want to be spiritually fulfilled-to seek answers and live in a righteous way-while, simultaneously, trying to convey sexuality and my experience with sex in a tasteful way. In other words, I want to honor God, but I also want to write about the spiritual connection that lies within sex. I wanna tastefully pen sex stories, to be blunt! ☺️ Sex inside of marriage is pleasing to God. It’s encouraged to keep the relationship healthy. Outside of marriage, there is some conflict. I’ll be reading and studying on my own-not taking others’ interpretations of what the word says. It’s just I am an expr...

 My father died, a month ago (2/12/25). I am not doing well. I was with him in the hospital room. It was not a quiet, just slipped away-type of death. Besides me, there were about 8 or 9 hospital staff members in the room, working on him. I lied. Eight or nine weren’t working on him. About 4 were actively working, the rest were just….there.  When I’m up to it, I’ll blog about the horrible experience at Piedmont Eastside Hospital-Snellville, GA. The two doctors that made me HATE that hospital. That’s where he died.  I’m from Louisiana, but I live in Ga. My father lives in-lived in Louisiana. He’s a widower, as my mom passed in 2016 (05/24/16). He was with her, in the hospital, when she died. They had been together for 40 years. Nine months prior, (09/05/2015) my 38 year old brother died. They grieved that lost. Mom never really recovered. She had lost two brothers in 2014. One in January and one in December. We began 2014 and 2015 with funerals.  Anyway, my dad visits...