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Dear You, From Me

You and I have never met, never talked, and we've never even spoken. But we have something in common. Something we share: We both love the same man.

I never have and will not apologize for how I feel. I love who I love. And my feelings for him are mine to own. My loving him doesn't take away from how you feel about him. Nor is it a threat to your relationship. But I won't ever deny allowing myself my truth.

Women are taught, from a young age, that we are competing against each other. That is as sad as it is disheartening. There is no shortage of love. And there is nothing wrong with two people loving the same, one, person. But we live in a pro monogamous world, so anything "other" is frowned upon.

And because I love him, I can let go of any selfish desires. I truly hope he is happy and safe. And I hope you treat him well, as I hope he does the same with you.

I hope you never see me as the enemy. Never think of me as someone who has a hidden agenda. And until my heart changes, I will continue to love this man, as I have for so long. He and I don't talk. And he doesn't feel how I feel. But we live in a world where most love is based on how the other person feels. And that's not how it is with me. I may never speak to or see him again. I'm at peace with that. But I am glad to have loved and known a man who's actions and lack of actions have taught me so much about me.

You and I, as well, may never meet. You may never know who I am or have the privilege of getting to know me. But we share an unspoken bond. A beautiful bond. We both love him. And love, itself, is such a wonderful thing. So take solace in knowing that because I love and care for the man just as you do, I want him to be happy. And if that happiness is with you, may you both be blessed.

As I always say, people: You love who you love. And you should always do that, unapologetically!

Nicole Rene



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