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Marriage….. Stuff

 It’s a beautiful day in Georgia, so I decided to sit outside and engage in leisurely activity. Logged into Twitter and came across a post by a male. He was saying how he hopes his sons marry chaste women. Virgins. However, if the non virgins are more aligned, spiritually, (and have repented) than the virgins, he’d be happy for his sons to marry a non virgin. That made me think of spiritual/symbolic marriage. Legal marriages are the norm in this country. When I say the norm, I mean they are the marriages acknowledged by the government and many people. Spiritual/symbolic marriages have existed for a long time. They, however, do not offer the protections or benefits that one gets from legal marriage (binding contract). 

This made me think of how symbolic marriages are respected or not respected. Calling yourself “married” because you’re with someone without having a spiritual ceremony is just that-words you use. It allows you to use the term “married” when it’s beneficial to you. If it’s not ordained by God, is it really a marriage? This is one of the downsides of polygamy. A man can have multiple “wives” but they’re usually in name only. Being married to multiple people at one time is illegal. Polygamy-more specifically polygyny (one man, multiple wives) is widespread in other countries. In the U.S., it’s more sporadic. There are polygamists spread out but the practice is not as understood or accepted as it is in some other parts of the world. Legally, a man may have one wife and the others are wife-in name only. They are not offered the same protections as the legal wife. They are single, as classified by the government. Now, do I think polygamy should be legalized? Not necessarily. I wouldn’t want my husband to have wives I know nothing about. See “Why Do Fools Fall in Love” to understand what I’m talking about. (I’ll be blogging-in another post- on my “adventures” in polygamy….STAY TUNED)! 

Symbolic/spiritual marriages can be hard to prove. If something happens to your “spouse”, you really have no legal recourse. It’s good to get legal documents/a will-some way to distribute property etc. Legal marriage can be a hassle, too. Joint taxes, incurring your spouse’s debt etc. It does, however, provide protections or benefits. There’s little to no question on your role in that person's life. By default, you are the go-to person. 

I guess what I really seek to find out is how individuals see symbolic/spiritual marriages. If I told you I was married to a man but not legally, do you count that as a marriage? Is it more palatable if there is documentation or does my word mean something? This question would be better directed at a specific person-potential significant other. I’m more of a small government type person. I do, however, understand and can appreciate the legality of having a marriage license. My partner and I would have to figure out what is best for our situation.

 I would like to see symbolic marriages have the same respect as licensed marriages. Are you less than a “wife” because you kept the government out of your home? 

Just some random, buzzed thoughts I was having…. 

-Nicole Rene

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